Crispy Cracker Coconut Mounds

Alternate title: Dipping Things in Chocolate is Hard.

I recently learned that the reason a lot of people don’t like coconut (according to two people I know who don’t like coconut) is the texture. I don’t really get it. Do these people just not like sweetened shredded coconut? What about desiccated? What about fresh? Or big dry flakes? I feel like there are way too many coconut types and applications to just give it a blanket dislike. I’m the kind of person who loves coconut, both in flavor and texture. I truly think it makes everything better. I was the kid who wished for Almond Joys at Halloween, who requested chocolate cake with coconut pecan frosting for every birthday, and who poked a hole in the bottom of every chocolate in the box, until I found the coconut one. I’m that person.

Tiki Week: Frozen Key Lime Pie Cups

Tomorrow is Mother’s Day, and that means we’ve hit the end of tiki week. Hopefully this little series has inspired you to do something fun and different for your ma this year. Put away the bubbles and scones and shove a rum drink and rumaki in your mom’s hand, for once! 

Peanut Butter Brownie Bars

Lets talk about the birds and the bees. Sometimes, when a guy and a gal fall in love, they make a baby. And when the gal in that scenario is Evan's sister (and the guy is her guy, obviously), they make our first nephew, an adorable baby boy. Sometimes the guy and gal live right, smack-dab in the middle of Manhattan (or, well, somewhere in Manhattan), giving us the perfect excuse to go to the Big Apple THIS WEEKEND (for the first time ever)! 

Similarly, sometimes when a fudgey chocolate brownie and a peanut butter blondie fall in love, they make peanut butter brownie bars. 

You can make peanut butter brownie bars too, without all the birds and bees business. But be warned…there's a lot of gooey, peanut buttery, chocolatey awesomeness going on here…who knows what that could lead to. 

Step 1: Preheat ove to 350, grease a 9x13 baking pan

Step 2: Whip up a bowl of the Brown Eyed Baker's peanut butter blondie batter (swap the peanut butter chips for chocolate chips, leave out the peanuts). Spread evenly in baking dish.

Step 3: Whip up a bowl of basic brownie mix, like this one. Add some chocolate chips to this too, for good measure. Spread evenly over peanut butter mixture.

Step 4: Bake for 35-45 minutes*, cool before cutting.

Step 5: Bite, swoon, love, repeat. 

*I didn't extensively test this, just pretty much made one peanut butter blondie recipe and topped it with one brownie recipe, and waited 9 months. I mean…40-ish minutes. 35 minutes wasn't solid enough, and 50 minutes was a little too dry. When you test them, they'll be gooey, and that's ok, as long as they seem set all the way through. 

Fresh Take on Fruitcake

You voted, and because of you (or, more appropriately, thanks to you) fruitcake is gettin' a makeover. I don't mean thanks to you because fruitcake needs a makeover, I actually kinda like the stuff. I don't understand why it gets a bad rap. Maybe it's because of the bright neon candied fruits, or the fact that it weighs more than a bowling ball. But I mean, it's not all bad. It's boozy, fruity, spicy…hello, holiday classic! 

Some classics shouldn't be effed with. It's a Wonderful Life, candy canes, and the holly-jolly fat man himself…those are classics that should remain the same. Some classics, however, deserve a makeover. And what better way to freshen up fruitcake, than by turning it into…cookies? COOKIES! FRUITCAKE COOKIES! YES! 

Swap out those tooth-achingly sweet candied cherries with brandy soaked dried fruit, and then wrap it all up in a spicy shortbread-esque dough. Roll it, slice it, bake it, eat it… and then wonder why the hell you've never made fruitcake cookies before!

Fruitcake Cookies

Adapted from Ina Garten

• 1/2 cup of each of the following, coarsely chopped:
• dried cherries
• dried apricots
• dates
• dried cranberries
• 1 cup chopped pecans
• zest from one lemon and one orange
• 1 tablespoon honey
• 4 tablespoons brandy
• 1 tablespoon fresh squeezed lemon juice
• pinch salt
• 1/2 pound (2 sticks) unsalted butter, room temperature
• 2 teaspoons ground cloves
• 1 teaspoon cinnamon
• pinch of fresh ground nutmeg
• 1/2 cup sugar
• 1/3 cup light brown sugar, firmly packed
• 1 large egg
• 2 2/3 cups all-purpose flour
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• raw sugar

Combine dried fruits, nuts, zest, brandy, honey, lemon juice, and a pinch of salt. Let sit overnight at room temperature.

Cream butter, cloves, superfine sugar, and brown sugar on medium speed until smooth. With the mixer on low, add the egg and mix until incorporated, then slowly add the flour and 1/4 teaspoon salt just until combined. Add the fruits and nuts, and stir to combine. Divide the dough in half and place each half on the long edge of a 12 by 18-inch piece of parchment paper. Roll each half into a log, 1 1/2 to 1 3/4-inch thick, making an 18-inch-long roll. Refrigerate the dough for several hours, until firm.

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

Before slicing, roll each log in raw sugar. Cut the logs into 1/2-inch-thick slices. Place the slices 1/2-inch apart on ungreased cookie sheets and bake for 12 to 15 minutes.